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Label: teen

Affective-sexual education guide for adolescents “Dare to feel, dare to take care and take care of yourself” prepared by Itziar Fernández and Pepa Horno for the Burgos City Council


Since CI Spirals, we understand affective-sexual education as a human right of children, and adolescents; but also, as a preventive factor that contributes to promoting healthy physical and mental development from an early age.

Our body is a source of communication, affection, tenderness and pleasure. We are sexed beings and sexuality is a dimension of the human being from birth to death, there is enormous variability in the ways of living it, to express it, in the ways of being and relating.

There are many reports and investigations that have been warning of the problems associated with the consumption of pornography from an early age and its relationship with the perpetuation of gender violence in young couples and the increase in sexual violence both within and outside the couple.

When these and these teens have been asked, They report that they turn to the internet and their friends to solve all their doubts related to sexuality; and complain that school educational programs are fundamentally focused on the prevention of sexually transmitted diseases, something that is necessary, but insufficient to understand the wide range of elements that make up a healthy affective-sexual and couple relationship.

And they are right: From educational contexts we have been addressing affective-sexual education treating different topics as if they were watertight compartments: we talk about stereotypes, gender violence, affective-sexual diversity, prevention of sexually transmitted diseases, leaving aside very important aspects.

The first part of your own denomination: education AFFECTIVE-sexual and everything that has to do with desire, eroticism and pleasure. With the arrival of adolescence, desire and sexual attraction are gaining ground. Body and hormonal changes are imposed and can generate a lot of uncertainty and insecurity. This can affect our self-esteem, and a fundamental step to be able to live our affective relationships in a safe and pleasant way is to feel good inside our own body. Pleasure is in the mind, and this is about loving and accepting us first.

The culture of the image and the bombardment of differential stereotypes for boys and girls through the networks does not help at all, quite the opposite, transmits an image of a "unique model" where they must fit in to feel accepted.

On the other hand, the way we express or live our sexuality is unique and personal. Diversity is part of human nature and there are as many ways of feeling and living as people on the planet. Questions arise like: “How is my body?”, “Who I am?”, “Who attracts me?”, “How do I show myself to the world?”. Approach diversity with respect for individuality, assuming a social responsibility to stop machismo, lgtbiphobia and transphobia will allow us to contribute to the establishment of more egalitarian relationships and to the fact that adolescence can be experienced with greater freedom.

Starting from this base, we want boys and girls to be able to clearly differentiate what an affective relationship is (you, free, safe and reciprocal) of a harmful relationship where we can fall into abusive models. That is why we have to talk about respect and care. Since CI Spirals today we spread the Affective-sexual education guide: Dare to feel, dare to take care and watch over you we have prepared Itziar Fernández Cortés and Pepa Horno Goicoechea for him Burgos City Council with illustrations of Patricia corrales, and that addresses affective-sexual education from this perspective, uniting the affectivity, sexuality and protection. We have written it in a direct and simple language so that it can be read directly by adolescents between 13 and 18 years, with some relevant information also for families.

We hope that your pages can be a material where adolescents find an answer to their curiosity., calling things by name, and highlighting the indivisible union between sexuality, affection, placer, respect and intimacy.

Itziar Fernandez and Pepa Horno

F's videos. Javier Romeo “The three intelligences and sadness” in Spanish, French and Moroccan Arabic

Now closing the revitalization of the Blog “UNICEF with protection centers” during the COVID-19 health emergency we concluded the videos for children, and adolescents (especially for those who live in protection centers) with this last batch.

In first video we explore our three intelligences and how to use them to better manage rabies and second video we saw how to use the three intelligences to better relate to our fears, which were the most prominent emotions then. In third video we focus on something very necessary after all we have lived: learn to ask for help better.

In this fourth batch of videos we become aware of sadness, and how to use the three intelligences to better manage it. Why, curiously, Now that fear for the health emergency is decreasing, sadness begins for all the losses. Loss of persons, who have died or disappeared from daily life. Loss of situations, how to go to the educational center, the times with friends and families and leisure spaces. And also missed opportunities, from the experiences that allow development, like education, relationships and leisure.

There is a temptation to pretend that nothing has happened. But what has happened, has passed, and we need to assimilate it little by little. We need to give ourselves time to go through sadness.

In this video aimed at children, and adolescents, we explore the use of the three intelligences seen in the previous videos to better manage sadness. With seven keys and a reminder of the importance of asking for help, it will be possible that we take advantage of the sadness to value what we have in each moment.

Here is the video in Spanish:

Here is the video in French:

And here is the video in Moroccan Arabic:

With hope and awareness,

F. Javier Romeo and Pepa Horno

F's videos. Javier Romeo “The three intelligences and ask for help” in Spanish, French and Moroccan Arabic

Here we have one more delivery included in the revitalization of the Blog “UNICEF with protection centers” during the health emergency by COVID-19 with a new batch of videos for children, and adolescents (especially for those who live in protection centers).

In first video we learned about our three intelligences and how to use them to better manage rabies, and second video we explore how to use the three intelligences to better relate to our fears. In this third video we focus on something fundamental after all we have lived: learn to ask for help better. Most of us have had a hard time during confinement, and children, girls and teenagers too. And now that there is more relationship, it's time to ask for help, from people close or far, to be able to solve what has appeared in this time and to be able to live with accompaniment the different experiences.

They are designed to be seen with children, girls and adolescents and being able to ask them questions like “Do you need any help from me that I haven't seen in this time??”, “Who else could you ask for help?”, “What other ways to ask for help can you think of??”.

Here is the video in Spanish:

Here is the video in French:

And here is the video in Moroccan Arabic:

With hope and awareness,

F. Javier Romeo and Pepa Horno

F's videos. Javier Romeo “The three intelligences and fear” in Spanish, French and Moroccan Arabic

Continuing with the revitalization of Blog “UNICEF with protection centers” during the health emergency by COVID-19, we continue with the videos for children, girls and adolescents living in protection centers. In this second video F. Javier Romeo explores how to use the three intelligences presented in the first video also to better manage fear, with six practical proposals.

Here is the video in Spanish (Castilian):

Here is the video in French:

Here is the video in Moroccan Arabic (Tangier-Tetouan dialect):

We hope you find them useful to talk to children, girls and adolescents of their fears and worries, both with regard to health, studies or social life.

With hope and awareness,

F. Javier Romeo and Pepa Horno

F's videos. Javier Romeo “The three intelligences and the rage” in Spanish, French and Moroccan Arabic

In the framework of the revitalization of Blog “UNICEF with protection centers” during the health emergency by COVID-19, we are making videos for children, girls and adolescents living in protection centers. This first video is double, and in it F. Javier Romeo presents on the one hand our three intelligences and on the other how can we use these three intelligences to better relate to our anger.

Here is the video in Spanish (Castilian):

Here is the video in French:

And here is the video in Moroccan Arabic (Tangier-Tetouan dialect):

In the coming weeks we will upload the following videos.

We hope you find them useful to better manage rabies during confinement (and during the steps towards the lack of confidence).

F. Javier Romeo and Pepa Horno

“Love and heartbreak in adolescence”, lecture by Pepa Horno in the XXIV Congress of the Spanish Society for Adolescent Medicine in Seville

The days 2 and 3 March this year 2018 I was privileged to participate in the XXIV Congress of the Spanish Society for Adolescent Medicine with the final conference. All presentations of Congress have been published in the Reports grows, Vol. 6, number 2.

The theme proposed me “Love and heartbreak in adolescence” (the link can download the PDF of the conference) I found a much deeper challenge than might apparently seem, because it started from the basis of being able to define what is loving overall experience, at any age, and particularly in adolescence.

A challenge of this kind and trust again, responsible for Spanish Society for Adolescent Medicine (SCHEMA) They showed me, suppose a process to find match. I requires deepening and systematization of management concepts in my practice, but if someone does not give me the opportunity I had not systematize. The conference today we broadcast from CI Spirals includes a definition of love as positive bonding, which must be distinguished from attachment, emotional intensity and emotional dependence. And likewise contains a proposal on the different experiences that should be included in the “heartbreak”: the duel, the link unrequited and destructive emotional bond. And it concludes by proposing a set of guidelines for professionals to accompany adolescents in these emotional experiences.

I hope the conference will generate to whom you read through this blog the same questions that led me to write it and people who heard in Congress.

Happy summer.

Pepa Horno

Campaign “Start to Talk” (“Start talking”) Council of Europe to address child sexual abuse in sport

The Council of Europe has outdone with a powerful approach to child sexual abuse in the field of sport with the campaign “Start to Talk” (“Start talking”).

The Council of Europe, through its Division for Children's Rights, And Adolescents It has as a cornerstone of its action to protect children, and adolescents against any kind of violence. It is especially known Lanzarote Convention, the Council of Europe promoted and launched in 2007 as a framework for protecting children, and adolescents against sexual violence, including sexual exploitation, and it is ratified by Spain. In 2010 developed the Bell “One in five” prevention of child sexual abuse among children in 3 a 6 years. We collaborated in this campaign and training materials from Espirales Consulting Children, we have continued to disseminate our formations in different parts of the Spanish geography (and that the Council of Europe itself led us to introduce in Italy Pepa and Javier in Tunisia).

For all this we two, Oven nugget and F. Javier Romeo, We welcome the emergence of this new campaign “Start to Talk” (“Start talking”) against child sexual abuse in the field of sport. With a very clean web, structured in clear and strong messages, around a video that is wonderful is organized:
… for the variety of characters that appear,
… to reflect that there are child victims, girls and adolescents of both sexes,
… to collect they can abuse both men and women, and other children, and adolescents,
… Also visible for children, and adolescents with some kind of special vulnerability (as disabilities),
… by giving a simple key: the responsibility to talk about is the environment adults.

This is all in Spanish, but also includes links to other resources to prevent child sexual abuse in sport, those already in English (including a directory of specialists among which is F. Javier Romeo).

And we love that also has been officially presented today along with campaign materials detection and prevention of child sexual abuse in the field of sport “Child sexual abuse is out of play” #abusofueradejuego we have developed from Espirales CI for the Superior Council of Sports and Youth Sports Foundation in collaboration with UNICEF Spanish Committee. Synergies add resources to move forward.

Watch the video and its power comprobad. And then I spread it. Sure you can have very interesting conversations with children, and adolescents in your environment, and professional.

F. Javier Romeo and Pepa Horno

Council for Children and Adolescents in the IMAS Mallorca

Child participation mechanisms and adolescents are one of the guarantees of the quality of any type of intervention that is made in the protection system. The more so after the last legal reform of the Organic Law 1/1996 legal protection of children (law 26/2015), that spirit transformer, It has included as mandatory processes listening to the child, girl or adolescent in any decision affecting him.

Actually, these processes should be as mandatory as a right of every child, girl or adolescent living in our country since the Spanish state ratified the United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child 1990, but still a pending task.

But, systematize these processes adolescent child participation is one of the tasks that represent a more radical change not only in the operation that is currently performed, but in the eyes of the professionals of the protection system (I referred to in all its facets include law enforcement professionals, police, health, educational and social), They used too often to decide and for the child but without the child.

So how are you arise when initiatives, pioneer in the Spanish state, and developed with quality, transparency and professional rigor admirable, worth disseminate.

This is not a Council of Child Participation any, a space that fortunately already exists in many Spanish municipalities, but a Participation Council for Children and Adolescents made up of boys and girls who are currently in the protection system in Mallorca, ie foster care programs or residential responsibility Majorcan Institute of Social Affairs (IMAS) under the Consell de Mallorca.

Are the boys and girls who live in the facility reviewing the issues that affect them of the measures taken with them, the intervention process that follows, your daily life in protection centers. Boys and girls from their experience in the first person protection system, propose initiatives for improvement.

Watch the video. deserves. Hopefully serve as an example of what is possible when the political will, professional rigor and warmth needed to develop a space for participation like this. Because there are always people who drive these changes with their professionalism and their confidence in the potential of children, and adolescents with working, and the work of Marisa Martí Llorca in this case has been essential for the development of this project. And institutions, as IMAS the Consell de Mallorca to assume its cost and profit, becoming institutional referents. And others, as Office of Defense of the Rights of Minors Government of the Balearic Islands, that support to enable visibility.

Pepa Horno

Guidelines for prevention and intervention families to gender violence among adolescents

The violence in teen relationships is a problem in which we work from CI Spirals years. During this time, we have witnessed a marked change in approach. The violence that occurs among adolescents in its different forms is one of the clearest examples of how it has managed to increase sensitivity to social and institutional reality.

Because violence was always present in schools but it acted very differently to it, since standardization or trivializing it as “kid stuff” to denial of the problem in all its forms by teams of teachers and administrators and families themselves. We've been making as an indicator of quality of a center that “do not appear to be cases of violence” understand as a quality indicator that the center develops programs to promote the emotional and sexual education, equality, coexistence and conflict mediation, among others. This evolution from denial to positive coping speaks of a change in social perception and institutional involvement in the same.

But one of the least discussed aspects of this problem is to work with families. It works, greater or lesser extent depending on the center, within schools, but work with families remains an open question, and so it is largely the involvement of families in activities and programs promoted by the centers to address these issues. But, when cases occur, coordinated work between the center, Family and social services, health and / or police are key in caring for victims and aggressors and aggressors, to not forget that we are required to meet the same way in these cases victims. And with them and they, to their families.

The materials we release today are key tools to mitigate this lack of strategies that families have when they have to address the reality that their sons or daughters are immersed in a situation of violence. They have value in themselves just because they address the anguish of families, and try to clearly and concisely give them some basic strategies for action.

On the one hand two materials focusing on gender violence in teen dating. The Guide for parents with teenage daughters who suffer gender violence together with the other material: My daughter's boyfriend mistreats: What can we do?, both made by Juan Ignacio Paz Rodriguez and Paola Fernandez and published by Zurbarán Andalusian Institute for Women.

guia_madres_padres_con_hijas_violencia_generoel_novio_de_mi_hija_la_maltrata

Both materials contained guidelines for action for families who suspect or have evidence that your daughter is a victim of domestic violence by an intimate partner. They give guidance on how to talk to her about it, indicators gravity of the situation, coordinated work with the center and the emotional support they have to offer his daughter in the process of breaking with the violent partner and rebuilt as a person, healing the damage that gender violence has left in it. Reconstruction necessarily involve your family.

As part of its protective duty towards our children, mothers and fathers more than ever we must know and be present in affective and relational networks of our children. We hope that these materials serve families who follow us and the professionals who have daily contact with families to incorporate practical tools to prevent and address this reality.

Pepa Horno

“Connect with Respect” ("Respect for Me, Respect for You "), Bridget Belgrave material for Nonviolent Communication work with adolescents and young

As a story in more detail in input mi blog “Towards a More Authentic Connection”, the weekend 12 and 13 September 2015 I had the privilege and pleasure of working again Bridget Belgrave. I met Bridget Belgrave already Gina Lawrie, Forming Certified by the Center for Nonviolent Communication (Center for NonViolent Communication, Servant), and 2009 and from that moment we began to work together to translate Dance floor CNV the Castilian. Completed translations finally saw the light in 2014, with some illustrative videos that can be viewed I made this entry for release. The Association for Nonviolent Communication It has organized a series of training courses in Madrid, Bilbao and Barcelona during September 2015, and for me it has been a pleasure to work again with Bridget Belgrave support team with the translation from English into Castilian and vice versa.

In preparing the workshop I have spent time reviewing all the materials I have the Dance floor CNV and Bridget en particular. And valuing all materials, each with its wealth, there is one that is still my favorite. In fact, Bridget invited me to share my vision at some point of the workshop, and in the end I also decided to write down what it is and why you recommend it.

connect_with_respect_belgraveThe material in question is only in English and not have subtitles or translations available, but I hope that does not discourage approach him. “Connect with Respect” (“Connect on respect”, literally translated into Castilian) is a multimedia material documenting a project that made Bridget Belgrave 2004 with 21 adolescents and young adults with an average age of seventeen. The project was proposed as an intervention to train boys and girls in situations of social difficulty Nonviolent Communication (which it is the basic tool that provided in the shaft Interpersonal communication CI Spirals), within the framework of a workshop building urban rhythms, for ten weeks.

Why recommend? Here is a summary of my reasons:

  • The DVD with the film, the 25 minute. Collect the key moments of the project, recorded therefore the three trainers as by young people themselves, and edited in collaboration with them. In fact, as told in a passage, the fact of viewing previous sessions helped them all become more aware of their own learning and getting behaviors that would be well suited to the needs of everyone. It is a graph document lets put faces (and sounds) to different situations, and lets figure out how to apply it in other contexts.

connect_with_respect_videos

  • The video is supplemented with the second part of the book, “Guide to the Film” (“Guide for the film”), on which sequence by sequence discussed everything that happens: each situation, how teaches Nonviolent Communication, Practice times, the real conflicts that arise… This will better understand the intent of each activity and the difficulties encountered and how they were addressed.

connect_with_respect_handbook_1a connect_with_respect_handbook_2a

  • And the third part of the book contains the complete program, ten weeks with all their detailed exercises and all materials also typeset (English), as well as incorporating a CD-ROM with the file of each material in PDF ready to print. Obviously the video does not collect all the exercises, so it is very useful to see the progression activity to activity, with the ability to replicate.

connect_with_respect_handbook_3a connect_with_respect_handbook_4a

  • The availability of a translation of what the Dance floor itself to Castilian, with title “Respect for Me, Respect for You”, within the complete package Dance Floors.
  • And the caveat Bridget Belgrave not attempt a project of this type without having one hand a strong background and experience in Nonviolent Communication, and secondly an educational team with some basis of CNV and experienced in working with adolescents. I made some of these exercises with adolescents and youth at risk in Madrid and went well, so I'm available.

In summary, a material worth seeing, read, reread and implement. And you can buy in your online store, Life Resources.

And if you want more clarification, do not hesitate to contact me and we can discuss this material and other, adapted to work with children and adolescents. And if you want to receive training in this material, Spirals CI since we can offer.

I hope we will soon be offering more projects of this style here and where we call!

F. Javier Romeo

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